Showing posts with label Association football. Show all posts
Showing posts with label Association football. Show all posts

2009-09-09

How Strong Is Emile Heskey?

In commentary on the England  - Croatia match this evening, Clive Tyldesley stated that the magnificent Emile Heskey "...is as strong as an ox".  That sounds strong, I thought, but it doesn't really quantify Emile Heskey's strength.  Obviously Clive Tyldesley knows how strong an ox is, which is lovely for him.  That didn't really help me though.  Am I, an urban-dwelling 21st Century sports fan, supposed to know what this means?  Is knowledge of the strength of an ox something that most of the audience possess?


In order to discover how strong Emile Heskey is, I consulted the 1958 Encyclopedia Britannica.  I got sidetracked by owls for quite a while but once I got back to the task in hand I learned that Ox is, when used correctly, the Saxon name for male domestic cattle.  It is often used, less correctly, to include all bovine animals including oxen, bison and buffaloes.  I don't know if Clive Tyldesley was using the word ox correctly or incorrectly, and I don't know how strong any of these animals are either, so this was not helpful.  


I decided to try a more contemporary approach and asked the internet how strong an ox is.  Yahoo Answers yielded these responses:


"id say weaker than an ox stronger than a turkey larger than a microwave lives in the ocean"


"cool question, dunno pretty strong i imagine."


"ermmmm about as strong as.......erm an ox? haha this is what u think about in ur spare time? just take it as its strong"


This was voted to be the best answer:


"Strong enough to kill you i hope"


I found this more entertaining than the 1958 Encyclopedia Britannica, though less informative.  Clearly researching the strength of an ox was going to get me nowhere.  I know as little about how strong Emile Heskey is than when I started.  What I have learned is that the soft plumage of the owl is the key to their hunting success (it makes their flight almost silent) and that people on the internet are really weird and can't punctuate.

If you know how strong an ox is, please let me know via the comments section.

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